February 6th, 2010 | 
Author: ‘I’ve done NLP – I can tell if you’re lying’
The old myth of the NLP Lie Detector Technique came up again in today’s course – just as it does in just about every NLP Core Skills Course we do. And it again struck me how sad it is that such a valuable body of knowledge as powerful and life enhancing as NLP is can be trivialised in this way.
Not only trivialised but misrepresented in facile and misleading NLP articles, websites, and training courses – to the extent that these trivialised versions of NLP become almost ‘accepted facts’ about NLP…
The NLP ‘Frogs into Princes’ book
The myth is based on an early observation made just a few years after NLP began to be developed in the early 70’s and mentioned in the great little book ‘Frogs into Princes’.
In it the NLP co-founders Bandler and Grinder suggested that some people look up and to their right when they are making up visual fantasies. And that they look up and to their left when they are remembering images from their past. (Note ‘some people’ – not everyone.)
And that if you ask someone about something in the past and they look up to the ‘wrong’ side (i.e. to their right) that they might be making up rather than remembering the answer. Bandler and Grinder then went on to caution against putting too much faith in this and pointed out that many people looked up to the ‘wrong’ side to remember things – they simply remembered with slightly less clarity.
That should be clear enough, shouldn’t it? They’re effectively saying here’s something that can occur but is quite unreliable.
Let’s not let reality get in the way of a good (profitable) myth
Sadly, it’s not enough. It’s simply an inconvenient and easily ignored fact for those who seek to offer a trivialised and sensationalised version of NLP for their own benefits. The type of person who markets NLP to a particular market as a way of seducing women, boosting one’s own ‘personal power’, or having power over others. (Which ‘particular market’? Well, ask yourself what kind of person would find such promises attractive… and why they might find them so.)
And it’s a myth that doesn’t do NLP any favours – any more than do the other dubious applications of NLP.
The real power of NLP
In 30 years of exploring NLP I have seen it used by people to transform their lives. I have seen it used by people to release themselves from life-restricting fears, phobias, and behavioural patterns. I have seen young people re-discover their faith in themselves through it. I have seen couples and teams use it to discover how to work together happily and creatively. I have seen individuals stop in their tracks, recognise that they were not living a life that was right for them and then change directions. And I have seen it used to free people from life debilitating and even life threatening illnesses.
To me that is what NLP was, or certainly should have been, invented for.
Make your voice heard
There is a thoughtful saying, often wrongly attributed to Irish philosopher Edmund Burke, which goes along the lines ‘All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.’
Maybe it’s time for real NLP Practitioners and Master Practitioners, the ones who have participated in full-length and full-syllabus 120-hour courses rather than the more commercialised ‘fast-track’ affairs, to make their voices heard – to balance the ‘lets’s make a killing out of this NLP lark’ clamour.
‘All that is necessary for the triumph of Trivialised NLP is that true NLP users do nothing.’
Posted in Various NLP-related thoughts & ideas | 
Tags: nlp book, nlp lie detector, nlp technique, real nlp
This is a classic example of people taking shortcuts – finding a snappy little titbit in something, creating what sounds like a useful, practical soundbite, and then repeating it, ad nauseum until it is perceived as received wisdom.
The other classic example is the “93% of communication is non-verbal) that I wrote about here (http://www.trainingreality.co.uk/blog/non-verbal-communication.php) – there is also a wonderful little sketch/cartoon/blog/animation on the subject by Martin Shovel (http://www.creativityworks.net/mehrabian-nights-an-informative-tale-about-miscommunication/).
I’m all for simplifying, approaching things with a desire for the clarity that reducing things to their essential parts (or “chunking up”!) can bring, but it is essential not to lose the essence in doing that. There appears to be a complete mis-match between a quality piece of chunking up that simplifies and provides an overview, whilst maintaining the underlying detail, and the approach that picks on (part of) one detail and expands massively from that.
Enjoyed the rant (yours, and mine!)
I’m almost evangelical about how ‘bad’ and ‘fast track’ and ’self centred’ NLP is so very different from the values driven, treat others with respect, take responsibility for your own actions NLP which I have been so gently and meticulously taught. NLP has changed my life, and I really struggle when people dismiss it as fake, fraud, or psycobabble. Learning NLP in a week cannot be the same as feeling it, experiencing it, internalising and getting NLP into one’s ’soul’. It is a hugely powerful tool which needs to be treated with respect. And it is a prime example of where a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. So I am doing all that I can to trumpet the good in good NLP training – and, with respect, to point out the difference between that and fast-fix, fast track ‘book’ learned NLP. They’re two very different animals.
As passionate NLPers, I believe that we need to demonstrate the difference between the “sheep dipping” type of training being offered by certain companies and the intense, experiential and very personal journeys that we have been though.
Personally. this has manifested its self in three ways, trying to live by the presuppositions of NLP, referring to it when I have used NLP and being willing to engage in the conversation when asked about the “other uses” of NLP.
I have on a couple of occasions considered not mentioning NLP. For instance, whist on my practitioner training, I didn’t include it on my CV, thinking that the interviewers might be concerned about “manipulation”. I also wondered about letting my team know about my NLP training and journey.
In the end, I updated the CV, the conversations with the team have resulted in several of them asking for more information and more recently asking for some sessions, even though several other conversation are still ongoing. ( a consultant colleague who was trained to use NLP to close a deal, a doctor who is convinced I have been programmed )
It is hard to escape the misrepresentation of NLP, I ran a search on the Apple apps store last night and was again presented with the usual mix of genuine content alongside the usual selection of manipulation and seduction products.
I agree with Carons comments. I am trying to be an NLP evangelist, whist respecting everyones right to their view and avoiding becoming an NLP bore.
Keeping quiet, can be a safe and easier route in the short term, it could also result in NLP losing its credibility and all the empowering, life changing knowledge not being shared with as many people as possible
We all need to act, by doing what we do and being who we are.
Sorry for the rant…it touched a hot button, not one I want to change.
I came to Avon Tyrell this week with very little if any knowledge of NLP despite my partner having completed Part 1 and 2 ( a testement, I guess, to her understanding that NLP should be an experience rather than be represented by a number of quick sound bites).
I was the culprit who asked the question, on this occasion anyway, of how one may access thought processes et al lie detector. At the time I was unaware of just how trivial and undermining this concept was. A mere four days later I realise that I have been on a spiritual journey that has huge potential to fundamentally change my view of the World and that NLP is for me, a potent tool to enable me to become a more effective human being. Perhaps a little self indulgent but wonderfully exciting.
I am, at this moment anyway, wholely unqualified to join the debate. However, it’s my intention to continue the process and will in future be diligent in communicating NLP myth free.
As a footnote, it’s a testament to your teaching skills Reg, that when I first read your above blogg, I took full responsibility for your reaction and that after a few reframing exercises I now take none
Hi Iain, great to have a blog comment live from Avon Lodge! Looks like you and the team will have a wondefully sunny final day for Core Skills with Jon.
Thanks, again, for your original question. It was so typical that it finally spurrred me into commenting – hence the original blog post last Saturday. As for not being qualified to join in the debate… Quite the contrary. Who better than someone qho is right in situ exploring Pegasus-style NLP for the first time
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Have fun putting it into practise over the next few weeks/months!
Great to be getting live commentary, especially for me as a wonderful reminder and prompt about just how great that first week at Avon Tyrell was, and how much my mental state changed…it took around three days for me to be able to turn down the inner voice so I could listen and learn without a running commentary; and just how good did that feel! Have an awesome end to the week everyone!
For me this is a more general point and it comes down to the old “map is not the territory” adage. A model is not reality, no matter how sophisticated it is. Almost all of the different psychological models I’ve come across that categorise/label people and behaviours only do so in a time/situational frame.
People love to label and categorise, that is part of what the brain is good at. In my opinion it is a measure of how well someone really “gets it” if they can see beyond this labelling being a fixed (or even long term) thing.