The current Pegasus NLP Newsletter is about incessant talkers – the people who talk at us – and talk and talk and talk.

Really skilled Incessant Talkers don’t just bore us, they actually affect our mood and our effectiveness – by scrambling our thinking.

I had an experience of this not so long ago whilst driving with an incessant talker as a passenger. As I began negotiating a tricky traffic situation I recognised that I couldn’t concentrate because their flow of verbage was preventing me from assessing how to handle things. Fortunately I recognised this in time and asked them to stop talking until I had got into the traffic flow. This they did – and immediately resumed their flow and continued for the rest of the journey.

Once I had recognised their style – and when to stop them from talking – it became a fascinating experience.For example:

• They seemed to have no interest in whether or not I was interested in what they were saying.
• They seemed to have no awareness of my need to pay additional attention to my driving at certain points.
• Not once was I given a moment to consider what they had said – their ideas followed one another back to back, without so much as a second’s pause.
• If I forced my way in I was allowed to comment on things, briefly – but my comments didn’t seem to have been heard.
• Not once was my opinion asked for.
• Their flow of chatter and topics never stopped.

From an NLP standpoint it was quite an amazing feat. And, as I listened, I tried to figure out, or model, what must be happening inside them to be able to function like that. (And, yes, I did ‘try’ to figure it out – without a lot of success).

The newsletter is the result of my subsequent thinking. It offers a few ideas on what makes them tick – and some insight into how their talking may be affecting their listeners…