We’re beginning with a new venue in Swanage in a couple of weeks and, once we’ve settled in, this could be ideal for such sessions. Probably after Christmas (ouch, that word already!)

Yes, the Bournemouth Group is alive and well – 2nd Wednesday of every month. Will put you on the mailing list.

to minimise the potential risk of any Pegasus nlp-ers becoming nlp bores (i’m cringing at some of the comments above and at thoughts of my own occasional slips into nlp bore-domain) I wonder whether you have/would consider hosting refresher opportunities for those of us who could use a wee reminder and an opportunity to play.

That said – of course the Pegasus evening groups may just be the place to play? Do they still run?

A lot of the NLP Bore phenomenon comes from NLP being taught as a collection of ‘kick ass’ techniques rather than what Richard Bandler many years ago described as an attitude plus an approach – followed by a collection of techniques.

But the attitude and the approach take longer to teach…

I’ve also had a few Born Again NLPer phases – last one in 1993 after a two week Richard Bandler workshop.

Looking back on them, now, they are definitely too embarrassing to relate!

The ‘NLP Bore’ series is/will be about raising awareness that it is only too easy for participants to get caught up in the revivalist-style NLP workshop culture, especially when critical thinking is discouraged or, worse, inhibited.

Like you say, being principles led is important to get a sense of perspective.

Also, I believe that it is important to create an awareness that it is us going through the experience, and it is really our way of looking at the world that has changed, and it is up to us to make sense if we would like to be understood rather than tolerated.

For me, this is a non-4-R’s approach to NLP in most uses. It manages, very simply, to try and avoid taking responsibility yourself and impose responsibility on someone else. No respect whatsoever!

Very glad, in you and in Pegasus, to have found people who train from principles rather than just in the use of tools.

In the early 90′s I got a free ticket to a 2-day NLP workshop featuring a Big Name. It was a lead-in to a longer and more expensive workshop by an Even Bigger Name. They had attracted a big crowd of about 200 people so it was easy for the presenter and hence-people to get compliance and inhibit awkward behaviour or questions.

The manipulation was so disrespectful of individuals that I left after about 2 1/2 hours!

And that’s when, in Pegasus NLP, we began actively ‘encouraging’ people on our workshops to discuss, question, and challenge.

Talking to them afterwards, a few thought it inappropriate but harmless. Others had played along to avoid the labels of party-pooper or prude, but had given random and fake answers. With the remaining, I got the impression it was the conditioning of the student/teacher relationship that “made” them participate in what was essentially presented as an exercise.

Nobody had anything complementary to say about the trainer however and mostly, people were using it as an opportunity to gossip and speculate about the answers that the trainer and the course organisers had been giving.

It’s the group thing that I found the most intriguing. It’s like there is a tipping-point percentage of people that influences the decisions of a group. Because only a couple of us opted out, the bias remained with the ones staying in.

Long before our own Pegasus NLP “4 Rs Model”, NLP had the Core Principle of ‘meet people in their own Model of the World’ which is about respecting each person’s reality.

I hope lots of people on your ‘course’ had the courage to respect their personal integrity and opt out of his un-NLP stunt.

Of course, the nice thing about stories like yours is that they put such people/games in the public arena for open discussion. There may well be lots of people who think this is how NLP should operate… And they are entitled to their views and their Model of the World. Vive ‘choice’ – just so long as people recognise that they ‘do’ have choice.