At a very basic level, one particularly interesting bit is the balance between the “duty, responsibility, ownership” part which is being challenged, and the “happy sharing” part. Speaking as someone who has managed to be on his second marriage by his mid-thirties, I lay no claims to expertise, but certainly have an interest!

My (current) view is that the balance of the two (in two separate dimensions) is critical. I think there needs to be a balance within each individual between acknowledging that there is the choice to continue or end the relationship (or little parts of it/activities in it), and that some duty and responsibility does exist and that your actions will have an impact on the other. The second dimension is that it’s helpful if the balance between these two aspects is at least similar in both of the parties involved.

I think the biggest challenge is when the balance between the two parties is too dissimilar. If both feel huge amounts of “freedom”, things can (but not always) work well, but equally I think it might (perhaps not always) work if both feel huge amounts of duty and responsibility. A significant problem area would seem to arise if one partner is dutiful and responsible, and the other is a “freedom lover”. I struggle to see how a relationship with that imbalance could every survive, let alone thrive.